Bring on 2015

Looking back at 2014, it turned out to be a pretty good year.

• We learned a lot about patience and God's timing by waiting to get pregnant. And it finally did happen when we learned to let it go into God's hands. 
• We got to spend time with my brother and sister-in-law who live in the Czech Republic and we only get to see every couple of years! 
• We welcomed a new niece and nephew into our family. 
• We got to watch Cora grow even more this year into the big 3 & 1/2 year old. She potty trained like a champ at the beginning of the year and started her first year of preschool and has adjusted well.
• I quit selling 31 to focus on my family and the youth group more. And even though I still love 31 products, I don't regret this decision for a second. 
• We have experienced growth spurts in both our church and youth group. It has been awesome to see seats filled up in the Sanctuary and Youth Room. The youth group went from about 8 or 10 last school year to having closer to 15-17 this year. It has been a fun adjustment!
• Craig has had another successful year working at Keller Schroeder. I am so proud of how hard he works. 

I'm thankful for this past year, but looking forward to 2015. We have a lot of changes coming our way!

• Cora will no longer be an only child. Our 2nd little girl will be born in April and we will probably all have a big adjustment period, but I can't wait!
• After 5 & 1/2 years, I will no longer be the youth director at NPWC. I will still help out, but decided I really need to take time in 2015 to focus on our growing family. I'm confident that Ross Geiser (one of my former teens) will do an excellent job leading the youth group.

I may not know what the future holds, but I am so thankful I know who holds the future. Bring on 2015! 

Expecting God to move

I have several things in my life right now that I want to happen. But for the past few months, I have basically had the mindset of "I'm not going to get my hopes up so I don't get disappointed if these things don't happen". Today I realized that this approach is completely wrong.

James 1:6-7 says "But when you ask, you must believe and not doubt, because the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. That person should not expect to receive anything from the Lord."

Even thought I have wanted these several things in my life, I have still doubted. Mainly to avoid disappointment. But that's not what God wants me to do. If these things are really in His will, He has got it under control. He will provide in his timing, but more than that...I need to EXPECT Him to provide in His timing.

One of my favorite verses is Psalm 37:4: "Take delight in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart".
It's pretty simple. But I keep messing it up. He's got this.

So today, I will focus on taking delight in the Lord and expecting him to move!

Grow in wisdom and stature

Tonight, Cora woke up crying after she had been asleep for a while. Craig was the first one to go in and hold her. Of course, I couldn't stay out for long. I rushed in there and held her for a few minutes then offered to lay with her in her bed (thank goodness she is in her full size bed).

As I was laying there watching her fall back to sleep, I prayed. I prayed that Cora would grow up to make wise decisions. I prayed for her heart. I prayed for her gifts and abilities and that she would use them as she grows older. I prayed for her future husband. I also prayed for her protection. This world is already turning into a scary place. I can't imagine what it will be like in 10, 20 or even 60 more years! Who knows what trials Cora will face in the future, but I pray that she will rely on God.

The verse that I thought of while I was praying was Luke 2:52:

 And Jesus grew in wisdom and stature, and in favor with God and man.

I want these things for Cora. I want her to grow wiser and grow bigger, but most of all I want her to grow in favor with God.

I consider it an honor to be her mommy and to be able to have those special moments to lay there next to her.

When I grow up...

Remember what you used to say when people would ask you what you wanted to be when you grew up? I used to say a teacher, a babysitter, or a cheerleader. When I was in high school, I thought that I wanted to be a special education teacher. Then after a year in college, I decided that Social Work would be a better fit. Then toward the end of college, I went on my first trip to Ukraine. After that, I worked as a Social Worker in Evansville while planning to live in Ukraine for a while as a missionary. I spent 5 months in Ukraine...teaching English to the girls and helping out where I could with the ministries and then came home. I moved toward Cincinnati to be closer to Craig since he was working in Southern Indiana (near Cincinnati). I worked for almost a year as a Social Worker before I felt led to be a youth leader. This is right around when we got married. We moved to Evansville, got married and then I started as the youth leader at my dad's church. Since then I have become an independent consultant for Thirty-One Gifts. And I have become a mother.

I guess I always knew I would become a mom, but it was never a big dream. I really had no idea what to expect, but it has rocked my world and I'm so thankful that God has blessed me with the opportunity to raise Cora. Now I'm sure I'm not the only mom out there with these thoughts, but I have really struggled the last year or two with what's next. I am still passionate about social work, mission work (especially in Ukraine) and I still love doing youth ministry and selling Thirty-One. I've struggled with my identity with who I am and wondered if it is enough.

I'm not sure when it finally hit me...but it did. I finally realized even if I never go back to Social Work or go on another Mission Trip or even if I didn't have Thirty-One or an amazing youth group..I still have it all. So many times we think our identity is in what we do for a living. But it's not. My identity first and foremost is in Christ. I was created in God's image and He loves me so much. AND if that isn't enough...I am a wife to a great guy who loves God, me and our daughter. He is a great provider and friend. And if that isn't enough...I am a daughter to parents who always showed me what it means to serve and love others. And if that isn't enough...I am now a mommy to a little girl who looks just like me and mimics me daily. I have such great responsibilities from being a wife, daughter and mother that it is silly for me to worry about the future and what I will do next. I have a lifetime calling of serving God however I can and bringing glory to His name. I also have a lifetime calling to serve and love my husband and also teach our daughter to love God.

So as I grow up, I want to be a Child of God, a wife, a daughter, and a mother. Those things will never change and I'm so glad I know who I am and where I'm going.